Learning To Play; Playing To Learn

I was at a play activity with some people in one of my moms groups, and one of the parents complained that since his daughter didn't meet the cutoff date, she'd be almost four before she could go to preschool. I mentioned our co-op preschool, and ones like it in nearby cities, that offered classes from age 1 or younger!
Other Mom (OM): "But it's not a REAL school, is it?"
Me: Excuse me? "Well, they have circle time, sing songs, have different activity stations, art projects, sensory play, pretend play, and indoor- or outdoor-playground time."
OM: "Yeah. But they don't really teach anything. Not like a real preschool."
Me: "Well, first off, I don't know about the older classes, since we've only done the 1-2-year-olds class. But she learns to share, wait her turn, listen to the teacher, stay with the group... You know. Social stuff. Plus she improves her fine-motor skills and verbal skills." (Since no one else can automatically interpret her speech like I can, she has to learn to say it clearer, or use different words, so she can be understood.)

The girl's father, who had been the one looking for a preschool, just brushed the whole thing off, based on this one mom's snobbery (her child was older and already in preschool.) Look, buddy. You wanted a preschool for a child technically too young to go to other schools. What exactly were you expecting? Yale for toddlers? My child learned the alphabet from watching an Elmo DVD. I don't need them to ram it into her at school. Offer it? Sure. But at 1-2 and 2-3? Please. Next year we start the 3-4 class, and I'm eager to see what we get to do. I know they have a whole slew of fun stuff that we've only glimpsed at Open House night.

Even my sister scoffs at our preschool. It happens to be in a church, but not run by the church. But she just views it as a fancy daycare. I found a co-op out near her, through a community college, and still it's not good enough for her. She waited until her eldest was old enough to go to a Montessori preschool (which is my goal, but Z just wasn't ready for a 4-5 day drop-off this coming school year. *sigh*) But then complains that her daughter seems to slip through the cracks because she's quiet and low-maintenance. And the other kids are all at least half-a-year older or younger than her, so no one at her developmental stage. So, say what you will about preschool for under-3. But no one in our class ever got ignored or left in a corner by themselves the whole class! And for me, having Z learn to respect and listen to another adult is a huge accomplishment. Even if the only interaction she'd have was to go tell the teacher she wanted to go into the Mommy room to be with me! (*sigh*)

But all that disrespect for a "non-scholastic" preschool made me want to write a post about how even the simplest of play activities is really subtly teaching them. They're learning all the time. Even when we think we're too lazy to do anything enriching, we probably really are, and just don't know it!

Playing with blocks: Creative expression and construction. Teaches sizes and shapes, bigger and smaller, weights and balances, height and depth, and possibly colors and textures. Counting, numbers. And when playing alongside a friend, sharing and cooperation. Possibly even teamwork, as they get older. Hand-eye coordination. And exercise: fine motor skills to balance blocks or place them exactly where they want, as well as broader exercise when moving around for larger creations. Problem solving. Sequencing. Spatial relations. Likeness/differences. Matching and classifying. Introduction to math concepts.

Playing on the playground (or gym class... okay fine! McDonald's PlayLand. Whatever): Learns physical abilities and limitations. Learns safety and caution. Learns to take turns and share pieces of equipment. Experiences joy and pride in achieving new skills. Large muscle development, balance, coordination. Energy/tension release.

Playing with puzzles: Satisfaction in completion, building self-confidence. Improves hand-eye coordination. Spatial relations. Matching, likeness/differences. Can work alone or as a team. Skills learned while doing puzzles help with learning to read later: putting letters to sounds, making words with letters, and making stories with words.

Playing with sand and water (or other sensory media; rice, play-dough, beans, corn, etc): Learns size and measurement, experimenting with different sized containers, cups and spoons. Opportunity for solitary, parallel or cooperative play. Cause and effect. Experimentation: will this float? Sink? Basic science concepts. There is no final product, no "right way;" low frustration. Soothing to feel sand or water running through fingers, pouring. Relaxing, so attention can be centered on tasks. Tension outlet.

Playing pretend: Learns what the roles of mothers, fathers, children, firefighters, doctors, princesses, etc are. Uses imagination. Starts learning how to think or feel like someone else (empathy.) Learns how to cooperate with other children. opportunity to act out life experiences and feelings. Emotional outlet. Understanding family relationships.

Playing with paints and crafts: Uses imagination. Small-muscle development (controlling the brush, placing the sticker, painting details with fingers.) New sensory experiences. Self expression. Tension outlet. Choices and decisions. Emotional satisfaction in getting to make choices and express themselves. Learns about doing things for others (making a card for Nana?) Learns how to use different materials/tools like scissors, squeeze glue, glue sticks. Sense of pride in accomplishment. Learns about shape, color, size, textures. Whole/part relationship.

Playing with manipulatives (ie: toys, play-dough): Explores new concepts. Creative expression. Practices emerging skills, reinforces learned skills. Fine motor practice. Cooperative play. Learns about classifying, sorting, predicting, problem solving, and analyzing results. Symbolic thinking ("this rock is a cookie") which leads to reading skills ("this squiggle is an 's'.") Develop knowledge of the world around them by using real objects and concrete examples. Learns how to learn.

Playing with puppets, dolls, stuffed animals: Creative expression. Able to verbalize feelings. Can begin to understand the feelings of others (empathy.) Role-playing. Explore situations that may disturb or confuse them, and find solutions. Stretches imagination. Cooperative play.

Playing with computers and other technology (smart-phones, anyone?): Learns how machines work and how they can help them learn more. Using the mouse helps hand-eye coordination. Touch-screens use fine motor skills. Computer games and apps help with problem solving, making decisions, and uses imagination.

"Helping" cook: Learns to follow directions. Stimulates and uses all 5 senses (hear the instructions, names of items, etc; see the measuring and changes each step; touch, taste and smell the ingredients, each step, and final product. Learns to recognize colors, shapes and uses from different kinds of foods and kitchen utensils. Has an opportunity to improve small motor coordination by using different tools and equipment.

Listening to stories or looking at books: Learns to listen. Hearing new words increases vocabulary and hearing them in context improves syntax. Learns about different concepts, people and places. Learns to enjoy books and reading. Stimulates the mind; visualizing what is being heard.

Singing, dancing, listening to music: Learns to appreciate music from different countries, cultures and time periods. Learns to express self and ideas. Increases vocabulary and speech development. Gains satisfaction for participating in a fun, physical, enriching activity. Awareness of different sounds, rhythms. Learning to listen, follow directions, take turns. Respect for others' ideas. Visual, auditory and memory. Cooperative play. Listening to melody/rhythm leads to pattern recognition, which is used in early math skills.

Snack Time: Opportunity to practice social skills and manners. Practice pouring, passing. Nutrition awareness. New taste experiences. Listening, following directions.

Field Trips (ie: running errands, eating out): Gives a variety of experiences. Helps form accurate concepts of the world. Learning how to behave in a variety of situations. Awareness of environment and community. Cooperative participation.

Cleaning up: Teaches responsibility, respect for property. Sense of cooperation and orderliness. Satisfaction in helping and completing a job.
[Yeah... no pictures of this. I can show oodles of pictures of NOT-this, though!]

So you see? Set them down with some blocks and they're learning! Blocks 101! Talk to them while they're playing (about what they're doing; what color/shape/texture it is; which one is bigger/smaller, lighter/heavier; how many are stacked up in that tower; where are all the yellow ones, etc) and it's like a Master's Degree for them!
Even if they're just watching TV while you're (ahem) blogging, periodically ask them questions about their show. "How do you think that made Elmo feel?" "Wow. It sounds like he's angry. How would that make you feel?" "Dora needs you to say 'Backpack!' Say 'Backpack!'" "Oh, you want a Pillow Pet now, do you? Did you know that commercials try to make you buy stuff? Yeah. That 'show' is really an ad to get you to ask me to buy you that toy. Did it work? Did they convince you that you had to have one? Does that make you feel tricked?"
And while it may make you feel like a total fool, talk to your kids. All the time. Narrate your life. From infancy. We were out with a friend, and he scoffed at me for pointing out a mannequin in a store window as we walked past on our way to dinner. I explained to Z that it was a statue to show off clothing, for a clothing store. And then inside the restaurant, there was a Chinese soldier statue. And she points at it and says "Mah-kin. Sta-shoo." See? New vocabulary, categorizing/sorting (both items were humanoid and statue-like, thus in the same "category.") And she's interested in the world around her, since we help her learn new things about what she sees. (Our friend rescinded his scoffing as she continued to wow him with her growing vocabulary and observational skills.)

But I'm still bitter about our preschool being disparaged.

Muffin Tin Monday - Byoo-duh-fuh Nunch For Baby!

The other night, as I was loading her baby dolls and accessories into the new (used) Cinderella toy chest Unka Kee-ile and Auntie Nizzie gave her for Kimmens, she decided she had to play with one of her babies right now. She chose "brown baby" (her name for it, not mine. I just call them all "baby." The others are "pacifier baby" who came with a pacifier tied on; "bottle baby" who came with a bottle tied to the wrist, although now I think she calls it "feeding baby" since it makes sucking sounds when you use the bottle it came with. There's a "pink baby" too, with a pink body/outfit (they ALL came with pink clothes!) but that may be Tually's. Oh, no wait. They each have a "pink baby." Slightly different ones though.)

Brown Baby is the second baby doll I ever got for her, and it was on super clearance at Target for $3! (First baby doll was Pink Baby. Then Brown Baby, Pacifier Baby and Feeding Baby.) She came with a hat, cloth diaper, and footie pajamas. When you press her tummy, she cycles through "Mama," "Papa," giggling and crying. When we first got her, Little Z would burst into tears whenever the baby made the crying sound, after I told her that the baby was crying because she was sad. Oops. I was just trying to teach vocabulary and emotion identification! I told her that feeding the baby made her happy again, but it didn't work. So we had to turn Brown Baby off for a while.

The reason behind the name, I'm ashamed to say, is because of the doll's skin color. This doll was intended to be Hispanic (hence the "Papa" instead of the more standard "Dada.") I don't care about what race/color her toys are, and it was super cheap, so I bought it. I have *never* called the doll 'brown.' I *have* shown her that her skin is a different color from that doll's (and any other toy with different coloring,) in an attempt to teach diversity acceptance in a safe setting where I won't offend anyone by pointing out their differences! But I also point out that *my* coloring is different from hers (I have brown hair and eyes, she has blond hair and blue eyes) and I talk about how everyone is different and looks different and can do different things, and everyone is special. I've started playing "I Spy" games with her when we eat out, as a way to get her to see differences without saying "look at the kid in the wheelchair." I'll say something like "I spy someone with brown hair" or "I spy someone with a hat." "I spy something that rolls." "I spy someone wearing purple" etc.

Anyway...

She finds the feeding spoon I got for her with a set of baby doll crap accessories and decides she must feed Brown Baby. Since I refuse to open the dolly sippy cup of old stale Goldfish crackers that was in with her baby stuff, she gets out the muffin tin from the Melissa and Doug Cupcake Decorating set and starts putting cupcake liners in each cup.
When I ask her what she's doing, she says she's making a "byoo-duh-fuh nunch" for her baby. Awwwwwwww! Too cute! A Muffin Tin Meal just like Mommy makes!
She puts a wooden cupcake in one liner, the cuppie with stale goldfish in another, and starts spooning out imaginary food to feed the baby from an empty cup.

Her very first Muffin Tin Meal!

FYI: Preemie clothes fit great on the littler baby dolls, and you can often find them super cheap on clearance racks, thrift stores or consignment stores! Cheaper than buying doll clothes! I like to shop Carter's outlet store's clearance racks, but sometime Fred Meyers has some too. Many other brands, like Osh Kosh B'Gosh, Children's Place and Gymboree don't make Preemie sizes. Gerber probably does. Babies R Us might carry some, but I've never seen any on the clearance racks. Newborn size (not 0-3 months. NB specifically) fits medium to larger baby dolls okay too. Brown Baby is wearing a NB-sized outfit I got for $.50 at a garage sale. Many moms clubs have community garage sales, so search Craigslist for club, group or multi-family garage sales! The moms club ones tend to have a great selection of baby stuff!
I usually have a 20% off $40+ purchase coupon for Carter's, so if I'm buying other stuff, I tack on some clearance Preemie clothes for her dolls. Off a 70% off rack I found a set of 2 onesies and a pants for $3, 3 pairs of Preemie booties for $2, and a 2-pack of PJs for $3. Plus the 20% off! So $6.40 plus tax for it all! Most toy store doll outfits you only get one shirt and pants, or one dress, plus maybe shoes or socks or a hat for that price or more!

**Shameless plug alert!**
If you know a kid totally into her doll, like an American Girl doll, for example, my sister makes awesome custom jewelry for the doll and/or child. She can do bracelets for both, necklaces for both, bracelet/necklace set for either/both, whatever! Personalized, if desired. Check her stuff out! You can contact her directly too!

Whack-A-'Munk, Paint-aminophen

For her 2nd birthday recently, I registered at Amazon for a Whack-A-Mole board game by Mattel. She saw it at Target one time and I had to hold her up to the shelf to use their demo version until my arms fell off. I promised her we would put it on her birthday list. Now, I know she's 2 and wouldn't remember 5 minutes later, and would never know if I had actually put it on her list, but why start deceiving her on the little stuff, when there's loads of bigger issues that will come up where my lies would be better served. I even saw it later at Toys R Us on clearance for around $5! I was about to snap it up when I realized - I don't want this stupid thing in my home. Why would I do this to myself?

Well, Gramma Barp to the rescue! She won't let my baby down! She knows SHE won't be on the receiving end of Z's newly-created 'Whack-A-Mommy' game. SHE won't be the one kissing scratches after an aborted attempt at 'Whack-A-Kitty.' And SHE won't be the one without any working AA batteries in the house the day Z wants to open it, and can only find some questionably used ones that turn out not to work and make the game go 'Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh' endlessly in an annoying, loud, high-pitched mole-y voice. (Supposed to say 'Heeeere Moley moley moley!') The day after her party she demanded that the box be opened (I'm SO glad she was too overwhelmed with dollies at her party, since toddlers with bats is not my idea of a good time!) Much 'Its BROKEN! Lights broken mommy! Waaah!' ensues. I bust into my 'emergency' battery stash (removed from my neglected, dust-covered 'personal massager' in a drawer so unused that my pile of worldly goods cluttering the floor had to be cleared to even get it open.) That's right. I put skeevy batteries in my baby's toy! I'm THAT kind of mom!

So, now that it works, she takes out some toddler aggression on it. Periodically she rediscovers it and obnoxiousness ensues! Well, today, she gathers all of her Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 Happy Meal toys from her room and dumps them in my lap. They have annoying little chipmunk voices, and when you press their 'hair' they chirp some little saying from the movie. My little smart-ass stands them on her Whack-A-Mole board and uses her Whack-A-Mole bat to whack them. I'm ashamed to say this was a proud, proud Mommy moment for me. Until she remembered her old stand-by, Whack-A-Mommy.

When hitting me no longer paid off (I took her bat,) she climbed in my lap and grabbed the Infant Tylenol I had by my monitor from the recall when I went online to get a refund. Now we have a firm rule that medicine is NOT a toy, and don't let her handle the bottles in a casual manner, whether or not they are child-resistant. But as I opened my mouth, I realized that I was going to dump it down the sink anyway, she could have the empty bottle to give medicine to her dollies. Now, my husband and I disagree on this point, but I win, since he's not here. He argues that giving her a bottle to play with will reinforce her belief that medicine IS a toy. I argue that I emphasize that her empty BOTTLES are toys and NOT medicine anymore, but that she can pretend they have medicine for her dollies. We also decorate them, and I tell her we do this so we will know that they AREN'T medicine. She hasn't seemed any more confused than she is about the dolly's bottles and pacifiers.

So I invite her to help me wash out the bottle, which she enjoys. She paints and splatters the bathroom sink with lavender sludge. She uses the squirt dropper and shakes the bottle around (it has a drip-resist thing in the bottle neck, which makes pouring it out harder, but if you shake it sideways, its slings it out in a nice little arc across the sink.) She was very good about not reaching in to the sink to get any on her fingers. I didn't even have to tell her not to. I told her that this medicine had gone bad and was not good anymore so we were throwing it away. After her little APAP Pollock project, we got out her sticker collection and she chose Abby Cadabby stickers to decorate the bottle for her dollies. Big Pooh got a dose of his 'tummy meh-nen' then off to watch some Disney Sing-Along Pooh before crashing asleep in her chair 5 seconds after rejecting my suggestion that we go lie down for her nap. Nuts. I forgot to feed her lunch.